........................................................................................ - a weBlog by Snowy and me.

Tuesday 31 October 2023

Putting The 'War' Into Awareness

I don't know what the mainstream news
looks like with the present batch of wars,
Israel vs Hamas (new in, October 2023),
Russia vs Ukraine (Feb 2022-the present,
or until one side finally gives in,
or Russia declares victory by leaving
the Ukrainian economy shattered
beyond all human measure, with 
it's agricultural capacity destroyed,
and Chernobyl in need of serious repair.

The last war I watched on television news
was in 1991, the first US/Iraqi war when Bush Snr
was the US president going against Saddam Hussain.
The coverage made no sense, the more authentic
to the battle the footage was, the more what we saw
looked like some sort of disturbing video game, 
which left me numb and unable to care who won.

I can well believe that the news coverage
of the present wars is even more coarse
than that of thirty years ago, and better avoided.
On my radio some have tried to speak well
and tried to humanize the Israel/Hamas offensives,
I am not impressed by them either.
   

Monday 30 October 2023

My Second Moroccan Holiday - Day Two - Off To The Seaside

Tuesday 17th of October 2023.

  Awake at 7 am, tired from bad sleep but okay. Out of the hotel for 7.15 to find breakfast. But before that we needed to find a hole in the wall to get some money. We definitively confirmed that Anthony's card was blocked and my card worked. The local currency is the Dirham, the notes come in denominations of 200, 100, 50, 10 and 5. The five Dirham note is always the note that looked the most grubby. The coins go between five Dirhams and one Centime (French) or Santimat (Arab). Because of the historic connection with France, where up to 1960 the French franc was the currency of Morocco, the Euro was also accepted as currency by many of the bigger local companies in Agadir.

  I was slow about interpreting the instructions in the screen, and pressing the right buttons to get the money out. I was relieved that by chance I chose a hole in the wall where the buttons were to the side of the screen rather than on the screen itself, and that I got and kept the receipt.  I have often had problems with the sensitivity of touch screens the same way I problems with smart phones screens that are meant to be 'touch sensitive' and don't work for me. Richer to the tune of 2000 Dirhams, equivalent to £160, we found our breakfast, a milky porridge, milky coffee, and the local flat breads to be eaten with tahini or apricot jam. The flat breads were very nice, and there were a lot of them. A couple went into my handbag for lunch, later. Walking away from the cafe, and the sound of The Koran being recited as we ate, we both enjoyed seeing the local dogs taking walks on their own. They looked so confident and happy, as if they knew where they were going. On the way back from the breakfast restaurant to the hotel we hovered around inside an interesting looking French supermarket, and found a large tub of what we hoped would be a thick set, almost ice cream like, yoghurt for 38 Dirhams. It took two attempts at finding a cashier who would serve us, we were very early customers. 

  The next bill to pay was 400 Dirhams, paid to the hotel, which was the local tourist tax. Refreshed, we set off to find the local car hire agency the Anthony had had previous had contact with. They were happy to accept drivers over the age of sixty five with clean driving records, unlike some of the bigger car rental companies. Here Anthony tested his card again, and again it would remained inert and not process any fee. I produced my debit card, and it did not process the car hire fees either, but my credit card, for which I wondered if I had remembered the code correctly-I use it that little, took the payment of 7000 Dirhams, equivalent to £560, easily and then the car hire firm surprised us by asking for a sum of two hundred Euros, in addition. I had the Euros, having brought all I had with me. My Euros were in our room back at the hotel. We agreed to the car and their driver drove us to the hotel where I would produce the Euros, and he would leave us with the car. I did not think through at the time if the car hire might have been cheaper were Anthony under sixty five, but with hindsight it seems like a good but moot question. I don't/can't drive and now aged over sixty I would make a difficult pupil were anyone to insist on attempting to teach me.

  With our bags packed and the room checked that we had left nothing behind, we booked the same hotel for our last night, in six days time, then we set off in the car, out of Agadir and away from the flat landscape around it, for the Atlas mountains between Agadir and the coastal town of Sidi Ifni, a journey of about five hours including a break in the fortress town of Tisnit. Anthony was intent on more coffee and Tisnit seemed self contained, pleasant, and easy to park in. I was more curious as to what there was in the markets, I was easily drawn towards the clothes stalls where for both men and women clothes there were full length 'gowns' on many rich and different patterns/designs, not that I was going to buy anything, the colours and size of the blocks of colour were what attracted me. Anthony and I toured the silversmith shops, which are historic to the character of the town. We ummed, oohed, and aahed over the contents of the many jewellery shop windows after our reviving coffee. I did privately wonder if we might return here, to explore further. I dislike having to ask directly, and enjoy much more the idea of waiting for the obvious to seem almost naturally obvious... 

  We arrived in Sidi Ifni earlier than we needed to, by 3.30 in the afternoon and found the hotel that we stayed in last year, and had booked in this year, very easily. No reversals of the car or going round the houses in the town. We went up the stairs of the side door, up the central stairs, amid the rooms, and onto the roof, to have our late lunch-whatever was left of the potato bread I had made for me, The yoghurt we had bought that morning for Anthony. Soon a member of staff appeared, and we were offered the room next to the room we had occupied last time. It was notable at the time that the staff seemed either lukewarm or inattentive in some way. Had the people who staffed the place changed since we were last there in May 2022, or was it that we projected a sense of being tired?

  My first decision on my own was to dip a toe into the Atlantic Ocean, a five minute walk from the hotel room, whilst the beach was sparsely populated. I can swim and no doubt could have immersed myself fully in the water, but up to my knees was enough. Anthony lay on his bed and enjoyed a rest after the five hour drive. 

  The first thing Anthony did was make enquiries about our evening meal with the staff of the hotel. Then we took our walk took us through the town When Anthony talked about a scene being right for a photograph I had the camera ready. We were not the only people who

were ready. Five minutes from the hotel two men in quite dramatic looking traditional Arab or Berber dress invited us to enjoy mint tea with them. 

  It was easy for us to think 'They are not doing this for nothing, what are they doing it for?' Particularly when they found that we spoke mostly English and then said to us 'We need to practice our English.' in English that did not need much practice. It turned out that they were travelling salesmen, selling Berber made goods, made in the travelling tribal communes, where wherever they stayed were they were only temporarily settled. The items they told us about as they showed us them included clothing, jewellery, leather work, decorative objects made from the ibis horn and other similarly rare materials. Anthony relied on me to be the one to say 'But we don't have any money on us. We had better be leaving.' softly but firmly enough that when they named prices for goods after telling us quite exotic stories about them they knew we would refuse. They tried me out wearing a Bedouin chief's tribal costume which he would wear at a Loya Jirga, tribal elder's council meeting. It was a sort of headmaster's gown and long white scarf that gets tied in a turban and wraps around the face and neck. I am glad I resisted their suggestion that I be photographed in it. It was very self-important looking clothing on me, definitely wrong. I forget the form of words by which we made our declension but eventually we got out of their grotto. Walking to the town centre after we confirmed each other's suspicions that some of the Berber craft work was not as good as we thought it should be, and whilst their stories were very good, some of the detail they shared did not quite add up, their stories had gaps in them.   

  We went through the market as it was closing, which including passing the poultry and the fish that were for sale on stalls which were 'challenging' to Anthony, who was more strict in his vegetarianism than I was. What challenged me was the obvious desperation of the sellers who spread their blanket just outside the market and tried to sell trinkets of little obvious value to the now diminishing trickle of passers by in the early evening light. My eyes were drawn across the way to the wreck of what clearly was a former circus attraction, on waste ground behind the shops across the road from the market. In my head was the questions 'Does every small town have such wrecks that the circus that visits leaves behind, because they can't be fixed/are not worth fixing?'. There was definitely a narrative going on behind the wreckage which had become a seat for some of the less prosperous looking local population.

 When we returned to the hotel there life in the kitchens. We had over an hour before eating and so settled into our books. I started 'Carn' by Patrick McCabe, one of his many caricatures of the small town Ireland that he grew up in. I liked the book partly because I could follow it, but I found myself even more intrigued by the recent Abacus books mentioned at the back that it was common in the 1980s to list, promoted on the strength or reputation of the main title. The title that intrigued me was 'Cannibalism and The Common Law; the story of the tragic last voyage of the Mignonette and the strange legal proceedings to which it gave rise' by A. W, B. Simpson. Perhaps it was the mention of eating with the cannibalism that made me take notice of the title. Our dinner was served at 8.30 pm, it was a traditional Moroccan meal. The starter was the local flat bread bread and dips, olive oil, tahini, and other dips. Then a vegetable tagine made with local spices. We were ready for it. I liked the presentation when the lid of the tagine was lifted off to revealing the steam coming off the contents, artfully heaped underneath.

  There was a small but tasty fruit tart for pudding. It was just as well it was small. Rather deceptively, the vegetables had filled us up. Back to our rooms with more bottled water brought from the car for 10 pm. The day ended with the usual back scratch for Anthony from me, one of the more consistent and small pleasures of life for him when I am around.

Please left click here for Day Three of this diary

Sunday 29 October 2023

My Second Moroccan Holiday - Day One - Departure

 Monday 17th of October.

  Our flight is in the evening, we don't leave until the early afternoon so what do we do. So the morning was taken up partly with Anthony trying to get some clarity on why the credit card he wants to take to pay for the holiday as we go along has been blocked. And the answer is to do with technology. When he set up his bank he did not speak to a live human being about whether he had a smart phone or not, or what sort machine he was making the application to be a member of the bank on. They assumed he would be mostly accessing his account from a smart phone, and he does not have a smart phone, and assumes at over eighty years of age he would never have to have one. I do have a a smart phone but I dislike the swiss army knife approach to technology that it embodies, where one bit of kit has so many uses and you have to know how each function works that I can't hold that much information without having to write it down for future reference. Anyway if his money might be stopped then mine might have to do. I messed around with food, and made potato bread using up old potatoes.

  We left Caylus at gone 2pm and I expected that we would make a direct route for the motorway but Anthony goes the slow route and pops in at the free multi-lingual library where people donate books en-route and we find books to read on the plane. Arnold Bennett for me, Patrick McCabe for him. Getting onto the toll motorway was easy. The machine gave the driver Anthony a card, the gate rose and off we went. Getting off/out of the toll system was not so easy. These exit toll booths used to staffed by live human beings, who made sure that everything worked smoothly. They no longer are. Whatever card or money Anthony tried it did not register and there seemed to be no human being about. Anthony felt isolated, frustrated, and angry at the ticket machine and it seemed like we were not going to get out. I suggested that he put a five euro note in at the right slot and we were let out, to drive on. He dumped whatever cards and change had not worked on my lap and I was slow to see my own visa card that he had tried there. I had to check outside to make sure it had not been dropped, it had not dropped. After five minutes of faffing about I was assured that where ever the card was it was not outside. On we went, five minutes later searching the loos change pocket of my wallet-there was the card-it had been flung at me with the loose change, Off we went and we found the right directions for the airport. Again I thought 'are we going to park in the airport? Time is getting tighter....  '. But no, Anthony parked on the route he thought the tram would take us direct to the airport on, But the tram no longer does that. Now there is a replacement bus route, a no 31 which by asking about and a miracle of timing we caught, with our luggage intact. Into Toulouse airport, and again more delays-we were checking in whilst the flight was being boarded and Anthony had to ask about the boarding pass for his return flight which he had not been able to print. My heart was sinking the longer the conversation in French went on. Off we got through security, through to the correct gate and we were the last board, Anthony was furious as we were told to wait, as people with push chairs were in front of us. We should have been grateful for the delay that they generated but one particularly haughty air hostess was sworn at in French by Anthony, and I marvelled again at how good the French language is for swearing in, and at Anthony's command of French expletives, given the French idealisation of liberty the best insult was always going to be 'fascist', even when the sense of loss of liberty was 'I did not get my way on my own terms'.

  We both got on the plane, not counting how close we were to missing the flight. Anthony at the front me at the back since when we agreed to this holiday together I got the flight details but I did not know which seat he was booked in, the better to book a seat near him. More aggression on the plane. Anthony took ten euros from me, to buy some tea with when the trolley came round, and as soon as he took the money I knew that they would want pre-paid credit with a credit card, Leonard Rossiter and Joan Collins had nothing in the exchange that went on when he asked for a cup of tea. I was by that time enclosed in the glum but cosy world of 'Anna of Five Towns' by Arnold Bennett. The lead character, Anna lives with her miser and successful business man father, and is about to start life as an adult. I appreciated how the miser did not make his home attractive and inclusive and made his meals mean and meagre. I grew up in a family where home and comfort did not seem worth investing in, except for the mutual and collective lowering of everyone's esteem in themselves. Needless to say I found the book engrossing. The sense of relief when we got the flight, where we did not count how close we were to missing it, was strangely similar to my sense of escape from the life I once had a shared in, where as a household where we collectively disinvested and downgraded ourselves and each other.

  The flight landed fifteen minutes earlier than expected. We were both soon off the plane and through security at Agadir Airport, where there were three or four policemen checking our passports, but only one stamping it. It was dark by now, I looked for Anthony, but he was well ahead of me. There was no security questioning me about my intended destination like there was on the first holiday. Into the night air just outside the airport itself and I think I saw the sign with Anthony's name on it first, but he was the one to arrange this taxi as part of the booking, including a late change of hotel since the hotel we liked, the Hotel Kamal in Agadir, had good rooms at lower prices. It was gone 9 pm by the time we were in the room and neither of us was very hungry, which was just well since the provisions I had made were tough rather than tasty. I did not mind the toughness. The one point that it would have been useful to ask, but we were too tired to think to ask about, was breakfast in the hotel.

  The first day was over. After the difficulties getting out of France our journeys has to get better from here. I slept fitfully, because I could not find my sleeping tablet, to take before lights out. But was glad of the sleep I got...

Please left click here for Day Two of this diary. 

Saturday 28 October 2023

As Diferent Wars Saturate The News

I cannot even end the old battles
that go on within me,
where after many decades
I now know who lied,
and what they covered up, 
but now it is too late for me
for me to know why they lied,
and what else they were hiding,
beneath what they were covering up.

Roll on the selective amnesia
where I only remember what I need to,
and forget what I now don't need to know,
and most of all, to KNOW THE DIFFERENCE. 
     

Friday 27 October 2023

Great Turn Off's Of Our Time (35)

It is now a standard part of young-persons-speak,
as used by most folk under the age of thirty,
to use the phrase that some cultural artefact
'is part of our DNA' as if memory, reinforced
through product placement and technology
were equivalent to the science of human biology.

Okay, so we have reached a point where we avoid
recognising how the processes of the reinforcers
of the culture we are part of process us,
but they don't have DNA, and neither will we
when the culture reinforces have finished with us.

Or at least we might have DNA,
but we will have little use for it,
we are far more likely to be dead
because of what the culture did to us.
 
 

Thursday 26 October 2023

Meanwhile In Germany in 1940... (7)

 'Then the coffin was carried out of the hall into the side room, the men stepped forward, the rabbi read a long Hebrew prayer, the men broke in with many Omiens, the women stood by the benches. Before that, those who carried the coffin washed their hands. No music. The deceased, who will in fact be cremated in Berlin, is supposed to have been very rich. It was noticeable how shabbily the males among the fairly large number of mourners were dressed.-My own need of clothing has gradually become grotesque. I have to save my 'good' suit and what I have is literally fraying away, I could at most try to buy worn items from the clothes store of the the Jewish Community. Feder told us recently that even before a corpse is cold the Jewish Community is asking for the things. Frau Voss is concocting a plan to obtain one Moral's suits for me. But the man was much slighter than I am, socks from the fallen Haselbarth, perhaps a suit from Moral, who killed himself-Jewish clothing in the 3rd Reich.'.

Thursday 18th July

An excerpt from 'I Shall Bear Witness -The Diaries of Victor Klemperer 1933-1941' first published in German in 1995, translated into English by Martin Chalmers 1998.

      

Tuesday 24 October 2023

Meanwhile In Germany in 1938... (6).

 'Yesterday the announcement of the death of Felician Gess at the age of 78. His life's work appears to have consisted of a publication on the Saxon duke Ludwig the Bearded and his relations with Luther. But he was always an uptight Teuton and in 1920 objected to my appointment. Now my most intimate enemies in the university, the two Fosters with their three eyes and Don Quixote Gess are in Valhalla, and i hope I shall never see them again. But on the one hand; how petty and comical my battles and troubles of those days seem to me now; and on the other how deeply Hitler's attitudes are rooted in the German people, how good are his preparations for his Aryan doctrine, how unbelievably I have deceived myself my whole life long, when I imagined myself to belong to Germany, and how completely homeless I am.' . 

Tuesday 5th April

An excerpt from 'I Shall Bear Witness -The Diaries of Victor Klemperer 1933-1941' first published in German in 1995, translated into English by Martin Chalmers 1998.

Sunday 22 October 2023

Meanwhile In Germany In 1938... (5)

So I have written curriculum vitae and publications list once again and sent them off. Among the documents I have kept here there is now the new curriculum next to the French version of May '35;it is less emotional by several degrees, I am no longer capable of underlining my Germanness, the whole national ideology has gone to pieces for me.- The scribbling took up an annoying amount of time. The rest of the time today was taken up with a shopping trip. The worst of the snow trouble is over, but driving is still very difficult and exhausting. I wanted to get cigarettes from Weinstein, the old Jewish dealer [...]; he had died four weeks ago, his wife has already moved away from Polierstrasse. The man was killed by heart trouble, my commiseration no doubt consists for the larger part of egotistical fears.'.      

Tuesday 11th January

An excerpt from 'I Shall Bear Witness -The Diaries of Victor Klemperer 1933-1941' first published in German in 1995, translated into English by Martin Chalmers 1998.

Saturday 21 October 2023

Who's Carbon Footprint?

We all have to use the media
at our disposal to get our grip
on 'the green agenda', nonetheless
feel appalled at the hyperbolic
levels of green-wash involved
in selling new electric vehicles.

Oh I get it that the immediate advantage
is how clean the air is where the vehicles
are being driven, but in the life-cycle
of the use of the car 90 % of the carbon
the vehicle is ever going to use is used
in it's manufacture. And yet the makers
won't tell the public that, but will pass on
their carbon footprint to the public
with the sale of the vehicle as if
they had nothing to do with the public
carbon footprint they are creating.

Meanwhile I don't drive,
I have never learned how to.
But I have hitched many miles
for my last 45 years on the planet.  

 

Thursday 19 October 2023

I Didn't Always Find Wanting This Difficult

I used to be confused about sex.
Many would say I still am,
but what has clarified for me
is how guilt, and lies about what sex is,
and 'what sex is for', conspire with each other
until marriage-once about simple companionship-
now get so warped by the urge to breed morals,
that through the law we begat loneliness,
and more isolation through consumerism
than anyone can count, as the houses we buy
and the lives we live are hollowed out
from the inside by the infantilizing urge
to consume in ever increasing amounts
sold to the masses as 'Popular Capitalism'.

Age will make us want less,
and feather simpler nests
than those we once lived in.  

Wednesday 18 October 2023

Meanwhile In Germany In 1937... (4)

'A vegetable garden and an orchard, a hen house, all of it only separated by wire netting from the pine forest, which Grete and the hens are free to roam. All of several degrees more natural and less park-like than in the allotment settlements closer to Berlin. Then there is the landlady's mother, something of a forest witch, 88 years old, deaf, garrulous, idiotic, inquisitive, stealing and hiding food, roughly treated by her children. 'Me old mother', physically robust, was in the Buch alcoholics' asylum, was taken out a little while ago because of the cost. On the last election day SA men turned up to get her to the ballot box. She thought they were forcibly fetch her back to Buch, screamed and struggled, was seized by the arms into the car. At the polling booth she was shown where to put her cross. given a glass of wine and taken home in a state of bliss. Thus she was one of the 99% of Germans who voted for the Fuhrer....  We were out up in grete's living room, it was very simple and makeshift, but all done with the greatest affection. e breakfasted in the summer house, the jalopy spent the night on the street in front of the house.

Friday 21st of May.

An excerpt from 'I Shall Bear Witness -The Diaries of Victor Klemperer 1933-1941' first published in German in 1995, translated into English by Martin Chalmers 1998.   

Tuesday 17 October 2023

Set The Piano Stool On Fire


 

Is is a wonderful 75 minute film starring now retired classical music pianist, poet and author,  and Alfred Brendel and young pupil Kit Armstrong who is also a genius level mathematician and a whizz with computers among several other skills. What I liked about this film on seeing it for the second time recently after seeing it on DVD when it was first released in 2008  was the playfulness between teach and pupil. Enjoy.   

Monday 16 October 2023

In My Present Media Muddle

I forget which church father/theologian it was
who taught that Heaven was watching the suffering
in Hell, the rationale being that whilst watching
others being mercilessly tormented
you can't be being tortured the way that
those who you eternally are being tormented.

Another rationale being that in Roman times,
when the populous were ruled by being given bread
and made to attend the circus at the amphitheatre
where the main meal to watch could easily be a lion
mauling a Christian to death. Any Christian viewer
of such a spectacle would be understandably relieved
and thanking their maker that they were not the one
in the ring, providing such a bloody and coarse entertainment.

I have a feeling that as Israel tears into Palestine
like a hungry lion tearing into a Roman Christian,
the world media is going to be divided again
into those who will watch frozen with detachment
and thank their maker that for viewing such conflict
they can feel relieved that the not in what they view,
and the numbers that see such conflict as pointless,
and as sickening to the soul, 'beyond being news'. 

Sunday 15 October 2023

Meanwhile in Germany in 1937... (3)

 'Who records the most wretched everyday miseries in his memoirs? Until my fortieth year or so I always had neatly cut newspaper in the smallest room . The toilet roll was a luxury enjoyed in hotels. Then I got used to the little rolls at home. I can no longer do without them anymore. But the few pennies they cost add up and are a burden. I used to smoke a pipe. I became accustomed to cigars and then cigarillos. I paid six and eight pfennigs each. The cheapest cigarillos are now the ones at four pfennigs each (and then only in a few shops, usually the minimum price is five pfennigs). I reproach myself for not going back to a pipe; it inflames my gums and tongue, it does not satisfy me; i carry on with four pfennig luxury with a bad conscience. And likewise in everything and with everyone. The ripped suit I wear at home - and people come to me and beg me for an old pair of trousers! But I have a villa and a car. The tragicomic will have a section to itself in my memoirs'   

15th April 1937

An excerpt from 'I Shall Bear Witness -The Diaries of Victor Klemperer 1933-1941' first published in German in 1995, translated into English by Martin Chalmers 1998. 

Saturday 14 October 2023

Two Blind Eyes

When we have to divide the little
fresh daily thought we have to offer
between an expanding number of outlets
something is bound to suffer;
the quality of comment, itself.

Is that when to say less? I think so,
particularly when
wars multiply
and honest reports of them appal us,
which is when we are meant to have more to say
than just how appalled we are
at actions that we cannot stop,
and our turning away from knowing
is like having two blind eyes.

That said we can still write about
what we don't know how to say to other people,
but keep it in diaries, for future use in memoirs,
where if enough of us all write their diaries
the diaries become a collective retrospective witness.   
  

Wednesday 11 October 2023

Division By Opinion

One of the less recognised temptations
for citizens of the Wealthy West
is to be so at ease with their rights
to their opinions,
their own choice media processing,
they fail to recognise it when what they think
becomes a cynicism hardened beyond all irony,
where with everything they say about others
they shrink from thinking through
that others might think the same about them.

They can no longer pause and think
what the journey might be like
when we walk in another person's shoes,
and feel fear that comes with such worn heels
that they are tenderised to silence
as they examine themselves for callouses,
the way that others have no choice but to do.
  

Tuesday 10 October 2023

Meanwhile In Germany In 1936... (2)

 'Last Sunday too only a very short drive for reasons of economy, but particularly interesting. Half by chance we found ourselves on the new Reich autobahn from Wilsdruff  to Dresden., less than an hour after it opened.There were still flags and flowers from the ceremony in the morning, a mass of cars moving slowly forward at a sigh seeing pace, only occasionally did anyone attempt greater speed. This straight road, consisting of four broad lanes, each direction divided by a strip of grass, is magnificent. And bridges for people to cross over it. Spectators crowded onto these bridges and the sides of the roads. A procession, and a glorious view since we were driving towards the Elbe and the Lossnitz Hills in the evening sun. We drove the whole stretch and back again twice (two times 7 and a 1/2 miles) and twice I risked a speed of 50 mph. A great pleasure, but what a luxury, and how much sand in the eyes of the people. There are constantly accidents at hundreds of railway crossings, thousands of roads are in worse condition, everywhere there is a lack of cycle paths, which would do more to prevent accidents than all the tightening up of the law. None of it is done because of cource it would not catch they eye. On the other hand 'THE ROADS OF THE FUHRER'!'.

4th October 1936

An excerpt from 'I Shall Bear Witness -The Diaries of Victor Klemperer 1933-1941' first published in German in 1995, translated into English by Martin Chalmers 1998.     

Monday 9 October 2023

Who Am I Here For?

The depths of feelings of horror
are often said to be 'deeper'
than the feelings of ordinary joy,
because where fear freezes us
joy contains a lightness,
an ease, that does not compare.

Ease or difficulty, in the end
it makes no difference
we still have 'be there',
be present, to find ourselves
in order to meet each other.

That is the best everyday
invisible miracle
one person can offer another.      

Sunday 8 October 2023

A Conversation I Often Have With Myself

And with the cheapness of books,
and their richness compared with other media,
the central point of view is the perspective
I always return to...

 

Saturday 7 October 2023

Meanwhile In Germany In 1936... (1)

Thursday 13th August 1936

'The Olympics will end next Sunday, the NSDAP* Party Rally is being heralded, an explosion is imminent, and naturally, they first of all take things out on the Jews. So much pressure has built up. The Gustlolff trial is coming up in September; the Danzig business has only been postponed, out Polish 'allies' have made the french general Gameiln a marshal, Mussolini has pocketed Abyssinia scot-free - and the Spanish Civil War has been under way for a couple of weeks. In Barcelona four Germans have been 'murdered' as martyrs of National Socialism by s revolutionary court, and even before that, they were saying the German-Jewish emigres were stirring up hatred against Germany there. God knows what will come of it all, but surely and as always new measures against the Jews. I do not believe that we shall keep our house...

The political aspect changes almost daily , it would be tremendous interesting, if it were not so dismal. The third Napoleon began his war of desperation over Spain but how much of an analogy is there? I hear repeatedly, the last time from Forbig, the teacher: Hitler really wants peace for another one or two years, because  our armaments ar not ready before then. But Mr Leon Blum cannot be ignorant of what every child in Germany knows. Are they so stupid in France that they're just waiting to be lead to the slaughter? But: Why have they taken everything lying down so far? In France from Germany, in England from Italy? Everything is completely opaque and dark. Probably no one, not even government, knows the real strengths, the checks and moods.'.

An excerpt from 'I Shall Bear Witness-The Diaries of Victor Klemperer 1933-1941' first published in German in 1995, translated into English by Martin Chalmers 1998.

For the second selection from Victor Klemperers diary please left click here

*in German Nationalsozialistische Deutsche Arbeiterparte a/k/a The Nazis, or the National Socialist Workers party.          

Friday 6 October 2023

Penny Wise, Pound Foolish

I was raised in an age of thrift
and the gender apartheid of strict roles 
when, by custom, married women
were banned from paid employment,
by employers. who reasoned that in marriage
women were chattels of their husbands,
and should not want a life beyond chattel-dom;
the husband was provider for both of them.

Their husbands did not always think that way.
In a good marriage the husband brought home
the wage packet for it to be opened
in the wife's presence, they both put
the house first, and what was left
the husband kept
 to keep up with his mates.

In a bad marriage The wife never knew 
what the husband earned, and kept to himself
he gave her a certain amount of money,
gave her instructions that were often impossible
to follow and kept his own assumptions
of how he spent his own money to himself.

Such men often complained, at volume,
in front of friends and family, about
how other's mis-spent their wealth
and lived beyond their means-
as if they were incapable of such a thing.

The theory went that having little,
and a lot to make money cover
made women use money better
than they might if they given more
having less stopped the women
wasting any of it on frivolities.

Whereas what men did with money
always seemed vital, and above questioning
even by other, similar and higher status, males.

Such men paid faint and feigned lip service
to any sense of democratic accountability,
and always think that dictatorships worked best
-systems where self belief at others' expense
always masks incompetence.   
 

Wednesday 4 October 2023

Signs Of Greater Age (57)

With communications technology
every new advance in the devices
for the home allow consumers
to complete more tasks from home,
and complete them faster,
and complete them in transit
for those who are travelling.

But as a person of a certain age
you prefer the life where one piece
of electronic kit did not do everything,
different devices do different things,
and you would like to have some
human interactions as part of the deal.

We can adapt to many changes
from our end of the chains of supply
and demand, but increased isolation
is not the way to a brighter older age.

And by the, yes, we will repeat ourselves...   

Tuesday 3 October 2023

Suggestibility Comes In Many Forms

Of course you may be be intelligent and cultured
without stroking your chin and have no need to think
about appearances, as for me personally
I prefer to play with my moustache.
In the end this is just a mildly sarcastic advert.  

 

Monday 2 October 2023

In Dust I Trust

I feel affirmed every time
I return from leaving my house
when I sense once again
how in my limited untidiness
my house smells of dust
and other natural odours.

I could be more tidy
but who would it be for?
So few people visit me
and I don't blame them,
I would not want to visit
a tidy me either, tidied away
I would not know who he was
and what he had to live for.
   

Sunday 1 October 2023

Picture Set Of The Month - September - Worn Breakers On The Beach


I took these picture in late spring 2023
when I needed a walk and my camera was my company
.

Most visitors to the beach would not notice
these figures, they are nearly all just a few inches tall.
  
But their shapes, worn and shaped by the water,
was what drew me towards them,
I thought the textures were other worldly.
 

This end of the beach, at Newcastle Co Down
is not that popular anyway, which increased my delight.

I thought of the figures as abstract representations
of characters from 'Alice in Wonderland'.