In the competition to find the country's biggest narcissist
the rules were set at who, through artifice of personality,
could take the least notice of those around around them
without having to acknowledge those they inevitably offended.
Since the biggest narcissists always offer themselves the biggest prizes,
e.g. Donald Trump standing for President on grounds of merit,
the competition standards were impossibly high.
It was soon found that for the award to be accepted
by anyone it had to be renamed as an honour
for charitable works-the better to help those near and dear
to the narcissist of the year to accept the prize
as a modest consolation for mirroring their keeper.
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