Beyond The Binaries

that inform sexual behavior - jealousy,
possessiveness and other irrationalities -
lives asexuality, a foreign land to most males.

It is a place of being
where touch is natural,
cool, and yet still sensual.
Where arousal confines itself
to the mind, whilst the body
finds folly in it's actions.

It is oasis I wish I could find,
and then stay in-for a fuller life.

But like many I discovered sex too soon
and in the wrong way, minus consent or enjoyment,
the lack of which made it a thorn in the flesh for, literally, decades.

Now, midlife crisis over,
and old dramas settled
it all seems as important
as it was intentional, that is neither
-just another accident to be dealt with.

What price/value of finding afresh
that wholesome place where I feel 'held'?
Of (re)discovering acceptance?