I can date when I became one of 'the unworthy poor',
as opposed to being poor but worthy. The tipping point
where my worth declined had more to do with psychology
than money. Aged eight in 1969 my mother stood over me
and shouted "I suffered in the war for you', to rebuke me
after some temporary ingratitude I had committed in her house.
My mistake was misunderstanding my fault: I was so poor
that there was no war where I could suffer for her, in the way
she had suffered for me. I was an ingrate with no experience
with which to reciprocate her sense of grievance. She wanted
a soldier to rescue her from parenthood, relative poverty
and the loss of her autonomy. I should have told her then,
because now I know, we all have to be our own soldier.
as opposed to being poor but worthy. The tipping point
where my worth declined had more to do with psychology
than money. Aged eight in 1969 my mother stood over me
and shouted "I suffered in the war for you', to rebuke me
after some temporary ingratitude I had committed in her house.
My mistake was misunderstanding my fault: I was so poor
that there was no war where I could suffer for her, in the way
she had suffered for me. I was an ingrate with no experience
with which to reciprocate her sense of grievance. She wanted
a soldier to rescue her from parenthood, relative poverty
and the loss of her autonomy. I should have told her then,
because now I know, we all have to be our own soldier.
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