Even the poor in our society
have six times more
than it's sane to desire
And the rich everywhere are always wanting
something for nothing, as if they deserve it.
When wanting less means less want,
how to make sure of our sense of sanity?
Even the poor in our society
have six times more
than it's sane to desire
And the rich everywhere are always wanting
something for nothing, as if they deserve it.
When wanting less means less want,
how to make sure of our sense of sanity?
Hope comes to me,
from the belief that when I am long gone,
there will be more of life to come after me
than there was when I was there to share in it.
To simplify what I have,
who I know, and what I know them for,
so that the next time the next word
or idea won't come to me in conversation
I can reassure myself that I am missing less.
Because time shrinks all things, anyway.
In the 1970s, as I reached toward
what 'being a grown up' appeared to be,
and as my hopes of mature choice
kept retreating from me, one phrase
that I found to convey how I felt
repeated itself ad nauseam,
and took on a life of it's own.
I wrote about 'having mixed feelings',
to spare the shame of my family.
until I almost believed it.
Adding the word 'mixed' to 'feelings'
meant to me that what I felt was complex,
and explainable. 'Mixed' gave me a pivot
away from how impossible it was
to explain to myself, then family and friends
that surrounded me who always denied
that anyone's life could be that awful.
Decades later, through several therapists,
I found the words it was previously
impossible to spit out, and they cleansed me.
The unbelievable life became not only credible
but disposable as well, with sympathetic company.
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| Étienne Trouvelot (1827 – 1895) was a French painter, astronomer and entomologist. |
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| In his youth he lived in France, as an adult, for political reasons, he lived in America. |
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| These water colour paintings are now remembered as the peak of his creative life. |
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| The precision of them speaks of many hours at the telescope, and slow resolve of memory to recall the images seen afterward. |
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| There are 14 of these images in total. Please left click here for an image of the man himself and a link to all the images. |