When Is A Door Not A Door?

When it is a metaphor for personal choice.

From early on in my life what I wanted most
was a front door that would help me choose
without malice who to let in and keep out.
Many decided on very particular doors,
spaces and boundaries, for me.
The choices presented seemed personal
but how personal were they?

Even as I was helped to choose,
my helpers helped themselves
more than they ever helped me.
They vetoed parts and selves
of mine which were more vital
than they knew, before I could stop them.

Whether the fear was of immorality
or sheer ineptitude made no difference
-I was shut in and beyond the pale.